Tales of Shiranai
The Nonsensical Geek Blog!
Phishing Fail!
Jul 29th
I recently received the above in one of my inboxes. I’m not sure who is more full of fail, the spammers or the people who fall for these things. Considering mental caliber of the average WoW player, it’s a tough toss-up.
My CAPCOM VS. NAMCO Wishlist!
Jul 21st
Rumors are currently flying that Namco vs. Capcom is in development. Like many fans, I have certain non-fighting game characters that I would love to see in it. It is already likely that we’d see most of the cast of Street Fighter, Tekken, and Soul Calibur in the game already, but what about less-than-obvious series?
Yuri Lowell (Tales of Vesperia)
Not only is Yuri one of the most bad ass Tales heroes ever, but most of his moves are very up-close and personal, as well as extremely chainable. Players could pull of some impressive combos with Yuri, which is also another plus for fighting game fanatics. His HI-OUGI would probably also translate fairly well into a “super move,” since it was mainly based on the use of his sword. While I feel that a good number of Tales characters would actually work well in the fighting game arena, Yuri seems that he’d fit in the most. Of course, wouldn’t mind seeing other Tales characters such as Lloyd Irving, Kratos Aurion, or Rita Mordio (blah blah blah).
Phoenix Wright
After hearing he had been scrapped from Tatsunoko vs. Capcom, I have always hoped that one day we’d see everyone’s favorite Ace Attorney in a future Versus title. While he doesn’t seem like he’d be a strong fighter, his finger pointing and “Objection!” special moves would be absolutely hilarious. It’d also be awesome to see Phoenix’s rival, Miles Edgeworth, make an appearance along with him.
Pac-Man
What better Namco character than the one who started it all? I’m sure that they could find some creative ways to make him work inside a fighting game. Though I have no clue how they’d do it, myself.
Temporary Blog Layout
Jun 18th
WordPress 3.0 messed up my layout, so I’m using a temporary one while trying to figure things out. Hopefully things will work out for the best going forward.
If I were in charge of those EVA remakes…
Jun 6th
As many of you are likely aware, Evangelion was rebooted in movie form recently. These movies are a retelling of the EVA story with updated visuals and a modified plot, and seem to be getting a decent reception amongst fans. Currently, two out of four movies have been released.
Personally, I don’t think they’ve gone far enough with these remakes. Despite the fact that I find the movies to be an improvement over the old series, the whole thing is still a psychologically warped engagement. Not to mention that Shinji still sucks, Gendou is still a bastard, and so forth. As a result, I have thought of several modifications to the presentation that would have resulted in a far better experience.
- Since everyone hates Shinji, Asuka is the main character instead. She speaks only German throughout the whole thing.
- In order to better facilitate Asuka’s role, the soundtrack is provided by the German band Rammstein.
- Shinji is replaced by Touji.
- Actually, scratch that. Shinji is replaced by Animate Tenchou.
- Rei II and Rei III are active at the same time. Rei II has a real attitude problem because Gendou likes Rei III better, and the two constantly battle to see who the “real” one is. Rei II calls Rei III a drek and replica, and eventually the two have a fight to the death.
- Actually, forget everything I said above. Rei is replaced by a bunch of clones played by Arnold Schwarzenegger.
- Pen Pen becomes an EVA pilot. He pilots EVA Unit LNX, which is fully powered by open source software.
- Kaji is replaced by Samuel L. Jackson. His revised role in the reboot is to punch Gendou in the face repeatedly.
- “Angels” are replaced by giant versions of anime characters everyone wants to beat up, such as giant Light Yagami and giant Lelouch.
- The Third Impact is actually caused when Asuka, piloting EVA Unit 02, fights against Chuck Norris. The sheer awesomeness of the battle causes everyone to explode.
